employed

I got the job at the lab. I think I'm in shock right now. Nothing THIS great has happened...well, let's just say that there's a difference between the good things that have been happening (new house, new car, paying off debts, etc.,) the difference being that those things weren't effecting my self-worth as much as getting fired from my office job had. That was the biggest blow to my self-esteem I had ever faced before. I tried so hard, and sometimes not at all, to get a job, but no one would give me a chance because they saw "FIRED" on my applications. I would try to explain how they had just made up excuses to get rid of me because they knew of their own troubles, but, for some reason, that excuse made ME look bad. Each time I'd apply and wouldn't hear back, I would crawl deeper inside of my skeleton. But now, it feels as if my life has hit the roof of the flesh above my skull. It's radient and warm and nervous, and, all of a sudden, all of these new emotions are overwhelming me. I'm excited, scared, in awe, denial, questioning, celebrating, dancing, sweating, jumping, everything all at once. I GOT THE JOB! I got the $10/hr, Full time, position in the analytical lab...the job I had wanted since December 2004, interviewed for once before, and was turned down. Only this time, it's mine, and I didn't have to wait until Friday. I start on Monday, and I never have to go back to the coffee shop again. I'm free....free of that job, free from the hurt and low self-worth. I'm back on track and ready to learn and do something that required mental thinking, weighing, testing (it's cheese products, by the way...nothing gross like diseases or cosmetics on animals, etc.).

Yayayayayayyayayyay! I don't know what more to say. I'm just so. in shock. and happy but worried but relieved but numb! I just don't know how to describe it. I'll get a white uniform and my own locker and a purpose, once again. We'll be able to afford our Subaru, and we're moving into a beautiful house. It all seems so perfect!

We had our eye appointments today. John's eyes changed quite a bit, whereas mine just a little. We both needed new glasses, and, once again, we picked out similar frames. Brown plastic frames with yellow clear stuff around the tops and sides of the front brown, if that makes sense. They should be here in about a week.

We're going to celebrate tonight. I don't know how to celebrate, because I haven't celebrated myself in a long time. :-)